I decided to go home for Spring Break and I took a cheap flight home. Now this was a charter flight meaning is pure tourists on the plane and I am the only Jamaican which didn’t bother me until I saw all the straw hats start to come out. Now, I don’t know what the straw hats are supposed to do because dem well holey and dem going to let through the light anyway but that’s waht they were wearing (TOURIST FASHION i SUPPOSE). Before I got on the plane though it wasn’t so bad but on the 6 hour flight home a nearly went mad.

Now, I have tourists in front of me, behind me and next to me. I almost died. There was this one nuff woman behind me that kept telling her children to not buy flowers from anyone like it was going to be Hawaii and we were going to surround her with leis as she stepped off the plane. She must not have known that bwoy we weren’t planning on selling her no bouganvillea bush or two periwinkle. Now, I’m in front of this woman and it’s kind of obvious that I’m a Jamaican being the only black person on the plane but she continues. Did you know that you’re not supposed to speak loudly to anyone and that you’re not supposed to give your luggage to anyone (NOT EVEN THE PORTERS) so I guess porters have no purpose at Sangsters.But all that was not as bad as when I had to get back on the plane.

Going back to Canada was even worse. I don’t know, maybe it’s the sun or island fever tek dem but what mek tourists think that dem don’t have to wear their shoes on the plne. I mean if I wanted to smell somebody’s mowly foot I’d tek off my own shoes. So everyboy walking around barefoot. This wasn’t as bad as the woman next to me. Now, she was barefoot but doing something else too. ALll of her inhibitions n\must have left her because my girl was FLOSSING her teeth on the plane, in THE seat. Not even in the bathroom. Now, I don’t care if she just come from vacation, you JUST don’t do that. Now, I don’t know if I was just unlucky, maybe I was, but bwoy I am never flying on a plane with tourists again.