Have you ever been in a situation where nothing seem to go right? An atmosphere of constant chaos and conflict is the last place any husband or wife want to be in. The desire of all married couples is to have peace, joy, love and harmony in the marriage relationship. When Michelle and I are at war, I cannot wait for cease fire! We have had our share of issues and have come out of a season of dysfunction so we understand the darkness and pain many married couples are experiencing right now.
DYSFUNCTION: deviation from the norms of social behavior in a way regarded as bad (Google definition).
Abnormal or unhealthy behaviors are the key result of a dysfunctional marriage relationship and many, if not all, marriages go through seasons of this dark time. It is called a CRAZY CYCLE. Husbands tend to refuse to show love to their wives and wives tend to hold back on showing respect to their husbands. The root of this twist is usually one depending on the other’s behavior and attitude toward the other. “You don’t show me love so I cannot show you respect” or you don’t show me respect so I cannot show you love.” This is the most deceptive mindset leading to major dysfunctions of quarrels, malice, going to bed mad, kids hurting, and even divorce. But only if husbands and wives can get this awesome reality in our minds put into action. This one key ingredient is the answer to turning any dysfunctional marriage into a marriage that functions again with love, joy, peace and harmony.
Surrender To Obedience
This is the only way a marriage will function normal and well. But how? It takes sacrifice to start but once both follow along it works like clockwork for both husband and wife, it just takes both to commit to it.
God created marriage and gives wisdom as to how to have a great marriage. He told every husband to love his wife, not love his perfect wife. He did not say to love her if she shows respect to him. He just said LOVE HER.
God told every wife to respect her husband, not to respect her PERFECT husband. He did not say to respect him if he shows her love. He just said RESPECT HIM.
Can you imagine if every husband learn how to love and every wife learn how to show respect? Now picture, husbands OBEYING God by doing his part, loving his wife and every wife also OBEYING God by doing her part, respecting her husband. This action on both part is the key to a great marriage.
It is very beneficial to obey the the one who created marriage, although it takes sacrifice. Think about the long haul. If you are in a dysfunctional marriage, take the step and do your part without waiting for your spouse to do their part. Trust God to lift your marriage to greatness by changing your spouse. Obedience is the key to change in your marriage. You can do it! Just trust the One who created marriage. Michelle and I have experienced this truth. Huddle up and enjoy each other as you become ONE!
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