This and all my articles are written only to encourage and shed light on marriage issues to help married couples take their relationships to a higher level of marriage enjoyment. So as a word of caution, if you are in anyway experiencing abuse of any kind in your marriage relationship please do not tolerate it. Seek Godly counsel immediately.
Michelle and I are die-hard fishing buddies. We are out fishing at the click of a button with our son Tyler. I love when the sun is shining bright but without some cool breeze it is scorching hot. That ocean breeze that we CANNOT SEE is our best friend. We depend on it all the way while we fish. I can never forget one of our fishing experiences in our dating years when we almost died in the sun. It was such a great fishing experience that we were just catching so many fish but there was no breeze. It was so hot I almost passed out. I remember telling Michelle we need to go and even though I said it I really wanted to stay because we were hooked on catching fish. It was a day when it appears that fish just loved going on our hooks so we stuck it out in the sun without that breeze. Finally we left and got some cold drinks to save our lives.
While on one of our fishing endeavors a very cool ocean breeze passed our way and I remember just lifting my shirt and letting that breeze hit me. I felt like I was in Heaven on earth. That is when I thought about the absolute truth. The wind blows all around but God is so good that he allows you to enjoy it without even seeing it. Except for men and women who get married with evil motives, almost every male or female join in Holy matrimony with good intentions. Both are goodwill people. When I proposed to Michelle I did had all good intentions and so did she. When you and spouse date and eventually get married, neither are thinking about divorce. Neither spouse usually think about arguments, quarrels, disagreements, mental and emotional issues. The wedding day is filled with joyful thoughts. I could not wait to put the ring on Michelle’s finger and go on our honeymoon to enjoy each other. This is the truth for every married couple.
After the fairytale ends here comes the reality of married life. You start to know each other. Life begins to really happen and the wedding vows are forgotten because of the HEAVY WIND of problems begin to blow in your marriage relationship. You cannot see it but it is blowing nonetheless. You start to question yourself “is this the same person I married years ago?” You begin have all kinds of questions like, “why is this happening now?” I remember questioning even the Lord, “why is Michelle like this?” The one reality we often times forget is that our spouses are asking the same question about us. The real truth is, often times IT IS NOT YOU OR YOUR SPOUSE REALLY BEHIND THE QUARRELS AND FIGHTS. There is an unseen force blowing the wind of problems that often times do not see that ignorantly and deceptively accept. Here is that one absolute proof found in a verse in the Bible that confirms this truth.
It’s Who You Cannot See
For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places, Ephesians 6:12.
The wind blows and you cannot see it but you believe it is the wind. Just the same there is an enemy you cannot see that is behind all the issues in your marriage. God created marriage but the devil tries to tear it down. God tells you and your spouse to be kind, loving, patient to each other but the devil says to be unkind, unloving, impatient to each other and we sometimes fall prey to his lies. Ever noticed that you end up saying a very hurtful word to your spouse in the middle of the disagreement? You then think about what you said and are sorry you said it? You then tell your spouse you are sorry. This is not really from you with a good heart. The truth is, we are weak as humans in our own strength but strong when we allow God to lead us.
This wind started blowing in the first marriage when Adam and Eve were instructed by God to not eat from a specific tree but the devil tempted Eve with whispering lies and she fell for it and then gave her husband some of the fruit which he also fell for and they both suffered. This suffering still exists today in marriages because we sometimes fall for this lie also. Satan is the master of lies. He is crafty working behind the scenes of your marriage relationship whispering lies into your and your spouse’s ears. But if only we can remember this truth and recognize who the real enemy is we would be slow to allow anger and abuse to be the driving force in our marriages. We would have great marriages only if we listen to the voice of God and follow only His voice and not satan’s.
Michelle and I have learned this truth. It is not really Michelle blowing the unseen wind of hurt. It is not really me blowing the unseen breeze of arguments. It is the devil we both allow and listen to at times. Our arguments and fights are reduced tremendously. We have learned to say “sorry” and “forgive me” because we have now developed what we call ENEMY RECOGNITION.
This is our prayer for every married couple, especially ones reading this article. You can have a great marriage when you recognize who is behind your problems and not allow him to dictate your marriage relationship. Huddle up and enjoy each other and not let any other get between you and your spouse except God. You will have a great marriage.
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