Back to school again – Country Gal A Foreign

Yes, chile, is back to school again. By di droves all kinda pickney a go back fi go get di lickle learnings. Big pickney, lickle bit a pickney, young and old granny a get dem education. Ain’t it a grand ting? If dere is one ting me can say bout dis Foreign, it provide opportunity fi all big gray-back ooman like me (not dat I am not still young, undastan, wink-wink) fi get an education.

Me memba when granny use to talk bout first book and second book an all dem tings dere an how teacha did beat di whole class bad one day because nobody nevah know say reindeer doan have horn, is antlers. Chile, you did know wha reindeer look like til you come a Foreign? Who coulda believe say is not horn dem got, for we know say cow an billygoat have horn. An Missa T did have one bad bull eena fi him common dem bway fraid fi cross it.

One day my breddah Frankie go cross di common say him is prize bullfighter and no bull cyaan badder dan him Frankie. Him get one piece a red cloth make flags and den him tie up him head wid mama red tie-head. Dat bway coulda take some chance wid him life, yuh know, for if mama ever did find out say a him take har tie-head, woe be onto him. Anyway, chile, him jump ova di wall wid all a him friend dem siddung like a spectator. An worse still, dere was dis girl wha him did like wha him did done boast to say him no fraid a nutting, not even Mass T bull. Everyday did bway take him lunch money an split it wid har. Him bring har icy-mint an mint-ball, buss-mi-jaw (some people call it Busta-back-bone), paradise plum, Bulla wha him carve out a heart pon it an all kind of sinting. (Me naah call no name but she know who she is). Di ongly ting him wouldn’t share wid nobody, not even di love of him life is him Tutti-Fruitti.

Anyway, chile, di bway go eena di middle a di common a wave him flags an puddung one piece a dancing. Everybody a holler:

“Frankie is a lion an a lion will devour you, you wrong fi trouble Frankie, you wrong.”

Heh, see yah, di bull hear di merry-making an look an see dis lickle wiggling ting eena him pasture. Him stamp, him fling him head and blow some blow dung. Frankie wouldn take heed. Him flag him flags an dance him dance. All of a sudden me hear:

“Hold di bull, hold di bull.”See yah, ma, dat bway fling way him flags and tek foot eena hand an bird speed. An dere was di bull behind him a blow some steam. I was abased. It was a spectacle. Anyway, it nice fi see everybody a go back bright an new fi go get demself prepare fi di future. An mek me tell you, education is di future, chile, especially eena dis yah Foreign.