Popular Jamaican dancehall artist ‘Busy Signal’ was arrested by members of the Fugitive Apprehension Team at the Norman Manley International Airport in Kingston as he disembarked a flight. Busy Signal was said to be fugitive wanted on decade-old drug conspiracy charges in the U.S. He is also accused of travelling on false documents. The reaction from Jamaicans is one of dismay, shock and disbelief. Boardlane TV rushed to the scene out side the Norman Manley airport to get reactions.

Boardlane TV: Sir, you are standing here silently and seemed to be in shock. Can you give us your thought on the Busy Signal arrest this morning?

Willy: (Shaking his head) A mi artist dat enoh lady! Mi tan up yah soh cyaan believe weh mi a hear to blurtnaught. Fus Dudus an now Busy?! Mi waan fi know is why di US people dem have up di Yaadi dem soh? Every blastid minute dem a handcuff  wan a wi an a sen wi a jail fi nutten! Come een like dem tink di yaadi dem a prison accessory.

Boardlane TV: Sir, the charges stem from him falsifying his name and alluding authorities. Those are charges that are concerning, wouldn’t you agree?

Willy: (Snaps angrily) GOH WEH wid dat! Every man who DJ have false name. Everybady wid a brain know dat. Unu expec di man fi DJ unda im real name? Unu GWEH!

Boardlane TV: Mister, that is not the issue. Did you know that is real name is Glendale Gordon and not Reanno Gordon as he claims?

Willy: GOH WEH wid dat again! Look how much a wi inna Jamdung have two name! Fimi birt certificate seh “William Buddy Stroker” but people all bout call mi “Willy Stroker. Ediat talk yuh a talk. All weh a gwaan is dat di man a cut im chune dem an a gwaan good an di farrin serpent dem cyaan lef di yute mek im eat a food like everybady else.

Boardlane TV: Ok, clearly I am not getting you to understand what is at hand. Thanks for your time. Moving on. Sir come over here and tell me what is your reaction to this arrest.

Danny: Lady, mi noh have nutten too tough fi seh enoh. Dis wan tek di cake. Jah know! All mi know is, Busy and Dudus fi get National hero status. Straight!

Boardlane TV:  I don’t understand. Why do you believe Busy and Dudus are national heroes?

Danny: Well, history claim seh Nanny ketch shat in har b@tty and Sam Sharpe buss outta im shackles an cause a revolution. When yuh check it out Dudus get nuff shat inna fi im b@tty an still noh dead and Busy Signal buss out a fi ankle bracelet. Might as well dem gi dem di heroes tikle.

Boardlane TV: (Laughing) OK. I hear you. Thanks for your time. How about you Miss. What do you have to say about all of this?

Claudia: (Wailing) How di rahtid Busy get imself inna dis dear Gad? Mi seh mi love Busy bad soh til mi cyaan talk. All mi a fret pan now is how im baby madda ago tek dis news… cause shi have wan hell of a big belly in front har deh now an di pickney soon drop? How di hell shi ago manige, eeh? Savior Gad, redeem wi!

Boardlane TV: Yes, that is indeed sad, But I am sure she will be OK.  You claim you are a big fan of Busy. Tell me more about that.

Claudia: Big, big fan Miss Lady. Anyweh Busy deh, I did follow backa im. If mi did have mi Visa, mi woulda falla im goh a di way a Englan weh im jus come fram. Mi love im soh til all mi woulda put aan ankle bracelet pan im foot miself fi stalk out im behine. (Wailing) Lawd mi God. Dancehall mash up now to rahtid cage! Dancehall business dun wid!

Boardlane TV: No ma’am. No need to be that dramatic. Dancehall will do just fine. Never mind. Dry your tears. We have just enough time to chat with one more individual. Sir, what is your take on this incident.

Lance: Bway a mi artical bredrin dat fi real. Mi an im move good an ting an mi jus cyaan believe seh mi bredrin did undacova all dese years.

Boardlane TV:  So you know Busy Signal personally?

Lance:  Yah man! An mi paardi datfi  bout 5 yrs now and mi come aan yah when mi hear di news pan di radio. Mi always a wanda why Busy neva waan goh a di States goh mek some dallas. Im tell mi seh im jus waan do di Canada an Europe circle caah as im explain it, di ‘Merican breeze noh good fi im skin. Im all show mi wan bwail pan im neck back weh im seh im get when im did expose to di ‘Merican weadda couple years ago.

Boardlane TV: And you believed that? You believe that someone could have a bump from exposure to the US climate?

Lance: Bway, mi neva questian it enoh lady. It did soun like sinting coulda goh soh but mi a fine out now seh a lie im did a tell mi now.  Di only ting im allergic to a US handcuff! Mi feel it fi im dowe caah right now im ago goh fram Busy Signal to Dial Tone.

Boardlane TV: Thanks for talking with us. That is all for now folks. It appears that this astonishing news surrounding Busy Signal continues to send shock waves throughout the island. This is Wendy reporting live. Have a good day.

© Written by Joelle C. Wright May 22, 2012

Books by the Author: A Soh Wi Do It  &  A Soh It Goh!

About the Writer
Wendy is an aspiring playwriter and the author of the book A Soh Wi Do It!. She recently completed her  second book “A Soh It Goh!”. Many of her ‘Jamaicanized’ stories and original sketches have been ‘viral’ on the Internet for several years. Many who have read her work has been known to laugh uncontrollably from the hilarious portrayal of the characters in the sketches. Wendy’s impressive writing portfolio includes the very funny Jamaicanized version of the Titanic, Cinderella (Punchinella) and most recently the sketch on the American Airline crash in Jamaica. Her work has been featured on the Jamaicans.com forums for over 12 years and enjoyed by many around the world.
Check out her website for more information on her books and appearances – http://www.ackeepodpublishing.com/

Author

  • Joelle "Wendy" Wright

    Joelle "Wendy" Cohen Wright is an author of character-driven Jamaican sketch comedy. She developed her love for sketch comedy after enrolling in a speech drama club in a Kingston primary school, where she won countless awards for her theatre performances. Joelle is fast becoming one of the Caribbean's well-loved comedy writers. With her irrepressible sense of humor and a flair for dramatics, Joelle's writing style has the right comedic timing that is sure to induce laughter through her storytelling abilities in Jamaican patois. Ever the natural comedienne, she adds a fiery jolt of pure comic bliss to her series of characters and hilarious interpretations of Jamaican every day life. Her first collection of sketches, "A Soh Wi Do It!" was published in 2010 and made rave reviews from readers across the world. The author dedicated the following years to penning the hilarious come backs entitled, "A Soh It Goh!" and "A Soh Dem Gwaan." Joelle holds a post graduate degree from the University of Maryland, University College, MD.

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